U Can't Finish.

Bigger campus.
Bigger classes.
Bigger feeling of emptiness.

I have been sitting in the same spot for the past hour.
At 9:00 a.m. I sat in thet same spot for an hour and a half.
It's deja vu in a completely different part of campus.
I thought that maybe by getting accepted into UCF I would feel more responsible.
Those feelings quickly subsided when I got to campus this morning and realized...
I know absolutely noone here.
I might as well have moved to Chicago THIS semester...atleast then i would feel like I was about to break down and have a panic attack in the middle of the campus.
Student Union is such an interesting concept...
a union is the bringing together of two people...or certain individuals...

so far... no unions. no new friends. higher feeling of anxiety.
Maybe im just not meant to be here.
Maybe today proves that this place isnt right for me.

Everything is so jumbled.
I absolutely hate it.
I wish there was some way to make the feels and doubts pass but absolutely, positively I just have so much remorse for even applying.
Not to mention, when you have someone from your past begin to talk to you the night before your first day...your insecurities grow worse.
I don't want to be remotely close to him...yet, we share the same campus, the same city.
My heart is not into it today.
But, i just have to stick it out and get straight A's...
and next semester I will be out of here.

Thank. God.