simple.

I like people gazing.
But, i do not like people gazing at me.
I think it is because I have this fear that people will judge me just by my appearance and then not have the interest to actually come up to me and try to get to know who I am as a person.
I suppose that happens when after three years of being with someone you think there is nothing more for anyone to learn about you...and even if there is...will you be able to regain those strengths and weaknesses and all those qualities that you had once before but then tucked away after you became dismal and routine?
I suppose some people would say no.
But, as the days go by...I can say...I think I have.
Last night, I reconstructed my ipod.
It was something I thought I couldn't do...but I mean, two hundred and fifty dollars is a lot of money just to replace the LCD screen on your ipod.
It just didn't seem worth the money to have it replaced.
So I sent out for the LCD screen, watched a couple of instructional videos and waited for my LCD screen to come.
A week later, it's here.
So, i crack it open...and about 20 minutes later...my once cracked LCD screen is now completely new and my IPOD has come back to life...thus...giving me a piece of my life back.
I didn't realize just how much I needed music in my life to make me happy.
Driving in my car today...I was just incredibly happy.
This wave of happiness hit me as these sounds I had listened to for months, and then gone without for three months...surrounded me...and i smiled...the whole way to campus.
9 am.
Smiling.
No matter what I think...music is my life.
It is my passion. I know this. Today was just a reassurance of it.
Nothing or noone will ever make me as happy as music does. And that's just the simplicity and beauty of it.
I DON'T NEED anyone to make me happy.
I just need music.
Funny...it's been around me all along...but I just thought a physical touch was what would keep me content.
I was so wrong all along.